Crossing paths

Before I wrote this blog, I was busy with anohter one for almost an half hour orso. For some reason I stopped to much to think what I wanted to wirte and what I didn't. So I decided not to publish that one. Because my blog is something where I put my heart in and def. all of my thoughts without really having a pause.

Yesterday I had a very weird moment. Where I was thinking that sometimes I don't know who I am. That I keep figuring out who I really am. Even if it means making a mistake or doing somethings by the "book".

Some people cross your path for a reason and sometimes you cross theirs. The reason that happens you sometimes know right away and sometimes you don't know it at all. But they are just there...

Whenever you look at these people who cross your path, you might think you will think of a million things. But sometimes you just look without thinking about anything at all.
Your mind is just at ease and your biggest worry is... nothing!

It's just the way you look at each other without wishing each other something bad.

When your life is going great, no worries, troubles etc., they are gone. But when you think you've reached the moment where your world will collapse; there they are!
Without you calling them or wishing for someone to be there for you. Just like an angel...

But when you feel that the point came that you have to move on and leave behind what had happenend or what you've learned from each other... it will or can be easy to do so and also very difficult.

Sometimes you don't know anything about this person or so little or sometimes you even know alot. Maybe trust isn't fully there, sometimes it is. It's just strange at some points and also very hard to explain.

But sooner or later you create a bond with this person and when you reached the moment you know you have to let go... everything will be oke! Cause if you think forward and how you will react if you will see each other again. Doesn't matter how long that might be, but there are only positive things. And surely there will be an exchange of smiles.

But then also... you have moments where you can't let go. No matter how hard you try. Sometimes you just feel you have to be there for that person even though you don't really know what the purpose is. But you just have to be there and it's the feeling you have.

Experience is the word everybody gives to their mistakes. Making a mistake in life is not bad at all, because you will always learn from it and see things from another angle.

Sometimes you can hold on to this 'stranger' who crossed your path. And he or she will create a feeling in you, that even the person who is close to your heart cannot reveal. When you think you are alone or need to be alone to think or think you can do it better alone; it can surprise you!
Because when you think that the best things are the things that come from your deepest thoughts... it's actually that what comes from your heart.
Just the fact when you think it's holding on that will make you a stronger person, it's acutally letting everything go...


De meeste dingen niet mogen zijn slecht voor het geweten, maar goed voor de ziel... by J.R.V.

'Eleven Minutes'

Once upon a time... That's how the book 'Eleven Minutes' by Paulo Coelho started. And why it started like that I didn't quite understand while I was reading the first few pages. But after I kept reading this book, page after page, word after word all the way to the end... I finally understood why the book started with those four words.

I got this book from a friend of mine, the first time I saw that book, it was next to her bed. I saw it, picked it up, looked through the pages and put it back. But after a few minutes I spontaneously asked her if I could borrow that book... and she said yes.

So Rachel, thank you for borrowing me your book.

When it was time for me to go home I put the book in my bag; and when I got in my room I was telling myself: today your'e going to read it. But "today" took me a few days to get there.

But oh am I glad I opened that book. In the beginning it was slow reading... But the more pages I started to turn over... the more this book took me along for the adeventure.

I could find myself in that book. I could see the character called 'Maria' as myself, except for the prostitution part... but for the person she was; strong, driven, confident and so much more. She had times that she was afraid, but she never let her guard down. Even when there where obstacles along her way she kept pushing herself. She also kept developing herself in any way she could.

This character... wait, actually I don't even want to call her a character cause she seems so real. This woman called 'Maria' is simply amazing! Maybe I found her so amazing because I could see myself in this woman. It's like the writer of this book took a few pieces of my life, pieces of my life till this very day and put it in this story. Which ofcourse, is simply impossible, so it's just a thought I have.

This strong woman who told herself she would not fall in love with anyone, because she had made a promise to herself and was not planning on backing down, fell in love. She fell in love with a famous painter called 'Ralf Hart' she met by chance.

In the beginning she didn't want to admit to the feelings she had for this man. But the more she fought it, the more she realized she's in love with him and all she thought about was him, she really desired this man and oh how did she love to spent time with him.

The relation 'Maria' and 'Ralf Hart' had with each other was just wonderful, it was not perfect... but simply wondeful. There was affection, they understood each other, they cared deeply for one another, they respected each other, they had the feeling of comfort and also of trust everytime they were together. But the only problem they both had, was that they couldn't or let me just say that they both find it very hard to tell the other person how they really feel.

But the way he touched her body, oh this man had magic hands. Just the way he looked at her could make her tremble. She enjoyed every touch of his hands over her body. With this men she felt like a virgin, she was very careful, but also very curious about his body.

Although 'Maria' and 'Ralf Hart' didn't have a relationship with each other; the attraction from both sides were very strong. This man was a romantic and had far more experience then she had. He does not really show his romantic side to her for they don't have a relationship with each other. But he's just a romantic not knowing what kind of signals he sends out.

He's that man that 'Maria' was constantly thinking about right after they met. He's the man she wanted to give up everything for and just be happy with him. He's the man she learned so much about and who challenged her. He's the man she will always love dearly.

The book 'Eleven Minutes' by Paulo Coelho didn't only let me think about the things I wrote earlier. But there were so many parts in that story where I could find myself; me being almost in the same stituations or thinking the same as one of the characters. This book is about alot of things... it's not just about the hot sex scenes or about prostitution and all of the other things you might read in it. This book is simply about the few little or big facts in life which you will maybe understand a little better if you read this book.

Altijd heb ik je lief.

1 december: Wereld AIDS dag

Wij moeten dit niet vergeten...

Begonnen op 1 december 1988, wereld aids dag gaat

over het opbrengen van geld,

dat bewustzijn toeneemt en het verbeteren van opvoeding.

Het thema voor wereld aids dag is in 2009:

'Universele Toegang en Mensenrechten'

Wereld aids dag is belangerijk om ons mensen

te herinneren, dat HIV niet weggegaan is en dat

er nog vele dingen gedaan moeten worden.

Volgens UNAIDS schattingen zijn er nu 33.4 miljoen mensen

die met HIV leven, inclusief 2.1 miljoen kinderen.

In 2008 werden er 2.7 miljoen mensen pas besmet met het virus

en ongeveer 2 miljoen mensen stierven van aids.

Rond de helft van alle mensen worden voor hun 25ste

besmet met HIV en worden voor hun 35ste gedood door aids.

De overgrote meerderheid van mensen met HIV en aids

leven in landen die een lage- en midden-inkomen hebben.

Maar HIV is heden ten dagen een bedreiging voor mannen,

vrouwen en kinderen op alle continenten op de wereld.

** Wat doe jij om mee te helpen..?

Weet niet waar deze blog "naartoe" gaat, maar ik vind het wel grappig..!!

1. Soms, maar wel vaak genoeg als iem. een vehaal aan het vertellen is (die mij niet echt boeit), kan ik niet wachten tot de persoon klaar is met vertellen. Zodat ik mijn eigen verhaal kan vertellen die niet alleen veel beter is, maar waarin ik zelf voorkom.


2. Niets is erger als je tijdens een argument door hebt dat je fout bent.


3. Het is een paar keer met mij gebeurt, dat ik over straat liep en plotseling door heb dat ik eigenlijk de verkeerde kant op liep? Maar in plaats van dat ik 180 graden draai en terug loop in de richting van waar ik kwam... moet ik altijd eerst "iets" doen zoals: kijken hoelaat het is of mijn telefoon even pakken of iets dergelijks. En daarna mopperen in en me zelf de zekerheid geven dat niemand om mij heen gaat denken dat ik gek bent.


4. Aventoe kijk ik naar een film die ik al gezien had toen ik jonger was en plotseling heb ik door dat ik geen f&*%king idee had wat er gebeurde toen ik die film voor het eerst zag.


5. Ik zou eerder proberen 10 gevulde platic zakken van de supermarkt in elke hand naar binnen te brengen i.p.v. twee keer lopen.


6. De betekenis van het woordje lol is van 'laughing out loud' veranderd in 'I have nothing else too say".


7. Verkeerde beslissingen maken goeie verhalen.


8. Ligt het aan mij of worden meisjes van de middelbare school sluttier en sluttier elk jaar..?


9. Heb er een hekel aan als ik net een 'missed call' heb gemist bij de laatste keer dat het overging (Hello? Hello? crap!) En wanneer ik terug bel gaat het bijna 8 keer over en dan krijg ik voicemail of een bezet toon. Wat ben je gaan doen nadat ik niet opnam? De telefoon ergens neer gezet en weg gaan rennen?


10. Ik vind dat de freezer een licht nodig heeft.


11. Niets is erger dan het ene moment dat je achterover leunt in je stoel en net een milliseconde daarna voordat je jezelfe terug kan trekken, je op de grond bent en denkt van: SH*T!!


12. T-shirts, blousjes, ondergoed, boxers etc. worden altijd vuil. Maar jeans broeken? Jeans broeken worden nooit vuil (als je mij begrijpt) hahaha...

Excellence (Voortreffelijkheid)

Every now and then I hear the word 'excellence' or in dutch 'voortreffelijk' coming out of someones mouth or it's just being used in a sentence. But whenever I heard or hear the word I can form my own meaning of what that word means without looking it up in the dictionary. But if it's correct that's another thing... But now I finally know what the word really means.

Last night I was in my room going through an old news-paper 'Dagblad Suriname' from august 6th 2009.

And then you had a page which had as header 'virtue of the week'. So it kinda caught my attention... No actually i'm lying...

The only reason I actually stopped at that page was because I saw a picture of a horse with something written underneath that picture.

So I thought it was something about horseback riding orso.

But it was not... It was een explanation of the word 'excellence' or in dutch 'voortreffelijk'. And when I read it I really thought to myself: damnnn, this word has a very strong meaning and as I was thinking that I also nodded my head along with it.

So I decided to write it on my blog. But not because I never knew what the word really meant but because I think this word itself has such a fantastic meaning to make yourself want to be great and all of those thing that come allong with the word 'great'.

So here is the meaning of the word 'excellence' or in dutch 'voortreffelijkheid':

• Meaning in english:

Means you do your extreme best at every task that you perform and in every relation that you have. You possess many possibilities. Excellence sharpens your talents and changes them in presents for the world. Excellence forces you to be humble and to learn from your mistakes. Each time when you do something you should try to improve by putting the slat higher and higher. Excellence is an effort led by a noble target. It is continuous mastership. It flows when you do something that you love. The development of a seed is the fruit that grows out of it. Excellence in your life brings your gift to bloom.

• Meaning in dutch:

Betekent je uiterste best doen bij iedere taak die je verricht en in iedere relatie die je hebt. Je bezit vele mogelijkheden. Voortreffelijkheid scherpt je talenten en verandert ze in geschenken voor de wereld. Voortreffelijkheid noodzaakt je nederig te zijn door te leren uit je fouten. Telkens wanneer je iets doet, probeer je je te verbeteren door de lat steeds hoger te leggen. Voortreffelijkheid is inspanning geleid door een nobel doel. Het is voortgaand meesterschap. Het vloeit wanneer je doet waarvan je houdt. De volmaking van een zaadje is de vrucht die eruit groeit. Voortreffelijkheid in je leven brengt je gave tot bloei.

Lessons

Ik heb geleerd....
Dat het leven is als een rol toilet papier; hoe dichter bij het einde, hoe sneller het gaat. "Vivere senza rimpianti"

Ik heb geleerd...
Dat we blij moeten zijn dat God ons niet alles geeft waar we om vragen.
Omdat als wij soms boos zijn dingen willen doen want wij normaliter niet zouden doen.

Ik heb geleerd....
Dat geld GEEN geluk koopt..!!
Het maakt je alleen gelukkig als je wat ermee kan kopen wat je graag wilt. Maar voor de meeste dingen in leven moet je werken als je iets echt wilt hebben...
Ik heb geleerd...
Dat de kleine dagelijkse dingen het leven speciaal maken.
Omdat de beste dingen in het leven altijd gratis zijn, maakt dan niet uit hoe groot of hoe klein ze zijn.

Ik heb geleerd...
Dat onder ieders harde schild, iemand verborgen zit die geapprecieerd wil worden.
Omdat iedereen wel zijn kryptonite heeft.

Ik heb geleerd....
Dat God niet alles deed in een (1) dag. Waarom zou ik dat wel kunnen?
Want wat ik niet kan, moet ik niet forceren.

Ik heb geleerd...
Dat de feiten negeren niet helpt om de feiten te veranderen.
Omdat een feit iets is dat op de waarheid is gebasseerd.

Ik heb geleerd...
Dat hoe minder tijd ik heb om te werken, zoveel te meer dingen ik gedaan krijg.
Omdat ik dan een adrenaline rush kijgt waardoor ik een "kick" krijg.

Ik heb geleerd...
Dat je los van je vrienden en familie iemand anders nodig hebt om je bepaalde dingen te laten in zien. Want als je die persoon niet goed kent en het klikt, lijkt het erop als je die persoon alles kan vertellen.