Be kind and full of LOVE...
but have boundaries like a mother*cker!
Life is hard, but in this case it is not your fault. Peoples bad decisions have gotten in the way of you having an easy going time and I wish I could help. I wish my words have gotten to you the way they have gotten to others, But I understand why they haven't. I am trying my best to convince you that you are doing an amazing job and that everything is going to be alright, but you are not okay. You are 'fine' or 'alright'. I just want you to be happy, I want you to be okay. We were so happy. You said it yourself, just like I did.
I do miss it already. Even when it was a few days ago. I am Catholic and do believe in something but not sure if a God does exist as I have never seen him myself. But sometimes I do ask for something or someone out there to take away the stress and a few others things followed. I hope he, she or it listened.
I am sorry I am not the best at things like this. It is funny but in all honesty I do not really know what to say. I guess the writer or chatter box is finally at a loss for words. I am sorry if I am not helping enough like you'd expect me to, but I am trying. All I can do now is try. Same as you. I hope you are okay, well I think I know at some point you will, but if not, I hope I can make you okay again. Happy, again. I will always long to hear you smile again. I wish people could keep their mind to themselves sometimes. This whole thing is not on you, literally none of this is your fault but you are having to live your life day to day thinking you have got fix everything even though you are not the one who messed up.
I am sorry you are going through this, you and your family. I am sorry it has to be this way. I wish my apologies meant something but they don't. The person who should be sorry is not. And I wish there was something I could do about it, but as I have learned. There is not. As I said once I am here for you through all of the good and bad times. I promised you that I am sticking to it, even if you get so slow that not even I could make you smile, I would still try.
Because I love you and want nothing more than to make you happy, to make you okay, to make you smile. I know this may suck, but until you are happy I do not think I can be either, at least for now. I cannot bear to hear you sad in pain or at a loss for reason. I am here giving you purpose, giving you advice, giving you reason. I hope something clicks and will all make sense. I hope you relax and take a deep breath. I hope my voice gets to you and I hope you are okay. I wish you were okay. I wish you were happy. More than fine, more than alright. It is okay or it is not. And sometimes fine and alright justify as not. I am sorry this is happening. I cannot say it enough. But, I am here always and forever.
Until things get better, because if I can help one day, things will get better. I love you. I am here for always.
"Don't expect too much from people because you'll always end up disappointed... and don't overthink, because that is the type of thing that could destroy you."
Dedicated to Diogo Manuel Vaz de Oliveira
22.04. 1991 - 06.04.2018